Finding out I was pregnant with twins was a shock. A big shock. Yes my bump had been bigger second time around and I felt more tired but I put that down to only leaving 15 months between pregnancies and running around after my very energetic toddler so when the scan said twins it was a big surprise.
The twins are now nearly four. They are scarily independent and as for the big boy now six his baby days are long gone. Perhaps this happens in all households at this time but the OH has started talking about having another baby.
I have very mixed feelings about this. I feel really lucky to have three healthy delightful children going for another feels like pushing my luck. Financially we can probably afford to give it a go but it means that any hopes of me returning to work in the near future is wishful thinking. My family is pretty balanced at the moment, how would another child fit into the mix? What would be the impact on my children? Health wise I’m ok but will be hitting the over 35 yr old mum pregnancy thing. I have a growth on my thyroid that is apparently triggered by pregnancy but its benign so it shouldn’t be a concern I don’t think?
And perhaps my main reservation is what if there is more than one baby again? The chances of a twin mum having twins again is apparently 1 in 14. Not that high, but not that low. I also can’t work out if secretly I want twins again but surely going from 3 to 5 children is madness?
So lots of things to think about. The OH says that if we’re going to go for it we should do it now as we may never get the chance again. I’m going to have to think long and hard about whether this is a real consideration for us. As always any comments/ advice is appreciated!
After my 2nd, I still had an incomplete feeling. We had a boy and a girl (27 months apart) and appeared like the perfect family, but I kept telling my husband, “I just feel like someone is missing.” Honestly, it took my husband a while to “get it,” but eventually he agreed that we’d have another child, for me. My 3rd was born (27 months after 2nd) and I immediately felt complete. Now when I see pregnant women and babies and I have absolutely no desire to do that ever again. It was the right decision for us to have a 3rd, and now I can say with 100% certainty that we are done.
I’ll add, I think it helped too to know, when pregnant, that it was going to be the last time. I was able to really savor the good moments and then be appreciative that I’d never have to do the bad moments again.
Thanks Rebekah, I’d always thought we would have three children and I think going from 1 -3 in one go meant I never had the ‘last’ pregnancy I thought I was going to have if that makes sense? I had images of flitting around with my baby and doing lots of great things and whilst I would never wish for it to have been any other way I’m wondering if this is why I have the sense that my family isn’t quite complete but I’m not sure I’m ready to go down that path again!